| This addendum to the Girl Code of Honor is for all the retarded ninny women out there who have taken the time to type me emails about what a retarded ninny I am for only talking about boys and clothes (no mention of anything else on my site as apparently the boy/clothes focus of this one piece utterly usurps everything else i've ever said). So, to make it up to the feminist community that I have so undermined with my vapid words, I offer this more thoughtful exploration of the "Issues." |
Section Five: Female Genital Mutilation
Section Six: The Workplace
Section Seven: The Internet
Section Eight: Lightening the Fuck Up
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Section Five: Female Genital Mutilation |
| Rule Five-One. Girls shouldn't mutilate each other's genitals. It hurts. |
| Rule Five-Two. College-educated American Girls shouldn't assume that they know what's best for the entire rest of the world simply because they can't wrap their gentrified little minds around other cultures. And they sure as hell shouldn't take up that tired "helping those who can't speak English and haven't even read Steinem and therefore have stunted minds and are completely, utterly, pathetically powerless to help themselves" posture, as it is SO passé. |
Section Six: The Workplace
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| Rule Six-One. Girls should get jobs.
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| Rule Six-Two. Girls should get paid the same for a job that a boy would get paid in the same job, provided they have similar salary histories and experience.
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Section Seven: The Internet.
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Rule Seven-One. No girl shall write angry, More Feminist Than Thou email from the account of their boyfriend or father, as it causes them to look not unlike complete fucking retards.
- VII-1subA) Girls shall embrace technology and ignore the subtle voices in their heads that tell them they can't use computers.
- VII-1subB) Girls shall learn how to troubleshoot their own shit so as not to rely on boys to do it for them, setting back the Movement® x number of decades.
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| Rule Seven-Two. You can always get a good vibrator here.
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Section Eight: Lightening the Fuck Up
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| Rule Eight-One. No girl shall consider her brand of Feminism to be the One True Brand of feminism, to the exclusion and derision of all others, hence creating rifts and stupidity and catfighting where absolutely none is necessary. Or, in the words of Breakup Girl, "Strong Women beating themselves up over What Strong Women Are Supposed to Be Like kind of defeats the purpose of Strong Women, doesn't it?" There's also an Anna Bondoc quote to be placed here but I can't remember it off the top of my head.
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| Rule Eight-Two. Judge not lest ye be mocked mercilessly.
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| Should any girl find reasonable fault with the definitions, rules, or guidelines expressed in this document, she is instructed to start her own fucking site about how stupid other girls are.
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